There’s a moment in every mom’s life when she finds her coffee in the microwave… from yesterday. Or she walks into a room and immediately forgets why she’s there. Or calls every child in the house by the wrong name—including the dog—before landing on the right one. Welcome to the glamorous world of Mom Brain—population: all of us.
Let’s just get this out of the way: Mom Brain is real. It’s not imaginary. It’s not just an excuse we use when we forget it’s Pajama Day at school (again). It’s a very real, very common side effect of having your brain hijacked by tiny humans and their endless snack needs.
I used to be able to juggle deadlines, hold intelligent conversations, and remember where I parked the car. Now I’m lucky if I can finish a sentence without being interrupted by a shriek from the other room and a suspicious crash. So if you, too, find yourself wandering aimlessly through the house with one sock on and a sippy cup in your purse, just know: you’re not alone—and you’re not broken.
Let’s talk about what causes Mom Brain, how it shows up, and most importantly, how I manage to stay (mostly) functional despite it.
What Exactly Is Mom Brain?
Scientifically speaking? It’s a combination of sleep deprivation, hormonal changes, mental overload, and the constant state of low-key crisis management that defines motherhood. Emotionally speaking? It’s like your brain has 82 browser tabs open at once, and you have no idea where the music is coming from.
There’s a lot of talk about “baby brain” during pregnancy, but nobody really warns you that it doesn’t magically go away once you give birth. In fact, it sometimes sticks around for years. YEARS. You know why? Because you don’t stop needing to remember all the things. You just add new things to remember on top of the old things. Doctor appointments. Birthday parties. Whether the dog got fed. Whether you got fed.
What It Looks Like in Real Life
- Walking into a room with a purpose… and walking back out again with a handful of Legos and no memory of what the purpose was.
- Asking your child where your phone is because you were using it… to look for your phone.
- Saying “Just a minute!” 47 times and then forgetting what they asked for in the first place.
- Calling your kid by your sister’s name. Or your cat’s name. Or your own name.
- Putting the milk in the pantry and the cereal in the fridge. (Just me?)
It’s not that we’re not smart. We are. It’s just that our brains are overclocked 24/7 and running on a system that thinks goldfish crackers count as a complete meal.
How I Cope (Most Days)
I wish I could tell you I found the secret—some magical formula that makes it all better. But truthfully? Coping with Mom Brain is less about fixing it and more about working with it.
1. Write it down. Immediately. On everything.
Sticky notes, phone alarms, whiteboards, the back of my hand—if it’s not written down, it’s gone. I have accepted that my memory is no longer a reliable place to store anything. I leave myself little notes like “CHECK LAUNDRY” and “YOU HAVE A CHILD IN THE BATHTUB.” Post-it notes are my love language now.
2. Embrace the calendar.
I live and die by my calendar app. If it’s not on the calendar, it isn’t happening. Soccer practice? On the calendar. Garbage day? On the calendar. The thing where I promised to bring gluten-free cupcakes to school even though I don’t know how to bake gluten-free cupcakes? Also on the calendar… with a reminder the day before so I have time to panic.
3. Prioritize sleep (as much as possible).
Okay, this one is hard. I know. Sleep feels like a luxury, especially if you’ve got a baby, a night owl, or a child who randomly wakes you up at 3 a.m. to tell you they can’t find their sock. But when I do manage to sleep, I notice a huge difference in how foggy my brain is. So I try. And when I can’t, I forgive myself and drink a lot of coffee.
4. Lean into the funny.
There are two options: laugh or cry. And frankly, I don’t have time to redo my makeup. So I laugh. I make jokes about calling the dog by my kid’s name. I laugh when I find the TV remote in the fridge. Because if I don’t laugh, I might spiral—and nobody wants that.
5. Ask for help.
This one took me a while. I thought I had to do it all, remember it all, be it all. But asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s teamwork. If I forget the dentist appointment, I’m not ashamed to call and reschedule. If I can’t remember what I went to the store for, I call home and ask. Sometimes, I even ask my kid. They usually remember better than I do.
6. Lower the bar.
The bar for success used to be color-coded binders and a meal plan. Now? It’s keeping the kids alive and only microwaving my coffee twice before drinking it. If I make it to bedtime with everyone fed, hugged, and relatively clean, that’s a win. The rest? Optional.
It’s Not Just You
Mom Brain can feel isolating. It can feel like everyone else has it all together while you’re just trying to remember where you put your keys (hint: check the freezer). But let me tell you something important: this is normal. You are not failing. You are just a mom.
A mom whose brain is doing overtime while also juggling emotions, logistics, and probably a handful of Cheerios. A mom whose mental to-do list is so long it wraps around the block. A mom who cares deeply, tries hard, and still sometimes forgets what day it is.
And you know what? That’s okay.
One Last Thing
If you made it all the way to the end of this post without getting distracted by a tiny voice yelling “Mooooom!”—I salute you. If you did get distracted three times and came back to finish later? I see you. You’re my people.
Mom Brain is real. But so is your strength, your humor, and your resilience. You’re doing great. And if all else fails, check the microwave. Your coffee’s probably in there.
