Friday, June 27, 2025

Mom Brain Is Real – And Here’s How I Cope With It

There’s a moment in every mom’s life when she finds her coffee in the microwave… from yesterday. Or she walks into a room and immediately forgets why she’s there. Or calls every child in the house by the wrong name—including the dog—before landing on the right one. Welcome to the glamorous world of Mom Brain—population: all of us.

Let’s just get this out of the way: Mom Brain is real. It’s not imaginary. It’s not just an excuse we use when we forget it’s Pajama Day at school (again). It’s a very real, very common side effect of having your brain hijacked by tiny humans and their endless snack needs.

I used to be able to juggle deadlines, hold intelligent conversations, and remember where I parked the car. Now I’m lucky if I can finish a sentence without being interrupted by a shriek from the other room and a suspicious crash. So if you, too, find yourself wandering aimlessly through the house with one sock on and a sippy cup in your purse, just know: you’re not alone—and you’re not broken.

Let’s talk about what causes Mom Brain, how it shows up, and most importantly, how I manage to stay (mostly) functional despite it.


What Exactly Is Mom Brain?

Scientifically speaking? It’s a combination of sleep deprivation, hormonal changes, mental overload, and the constant state of low-key crisis management that defines motherhood. Emotionally speaking? It’s like your brain has 82 browser tabs open at once, and you have no idea where the music is coming from.

There’s a lot of talk about “baby brain” during pregnancy, but nobody really warns you that it doesn’t magically go away once you give birth. In fact, it sometimes sticks around for years. YEARS. You know why? Because you don’t stop needing to remember all the things. You just add new things to remember on top of the old things. Doctor appointments. Birthday parties. Whether the dog got fed. Whether you got fed.


What It Looks Like in Real Life

  • Walking into a room with a purpose… and walking back out again with a handful of Legos and no memory of what the purpose was.
  • Asking your child where your phone is because you were using it… to look for your phone.
  • Saying “Just a minute!” 47 times and then forgetting what they asked for in the first place.
  • Calling your kid by your sister’s name. Or your cat’s name. Or your own name.
  • Putting the milk in the pantry and the cereal in the fridge. (Just me?)

It’s not that we’re not smart. We are. It’s just that our brains are overclocked 24/7 and running on a system that thinks goldfish crackers count as a complete meal.


How I Cope (Most Days)

I wish I could tell you I found the secret—some magical formula that makes it all better. But truthfully? Coping with Mom Brain is less about fixing it and more about working with it.

1. Write it down. Immediately. On everything.

Sticky notes, phone alarms, whiteboards, the back of my hand—if it’s not written down, it’s gone. I have accepted that my memory is no longer a reliable place to store anything. I leave myself little notes like “CHECK LAUNDRY” and “YOU HAVE A CHILD IN THE BATHTUB.” Post-it notes are my love language now.

2. Embrace the calendar.

I live and die by my calendar app. If it’s not on the calendar, it isn’t happening. Soccer practice? On the calendar. Garbage day? On the calendar. The thing where I promised to bring gluten-free cupcakes to school even though I don’t know how to bake gluten-free cupcakes? Also on the calendar… with a reminder the day before so I have time to panic.

3. Prioritize sleep (as much as possible).

Okay, this one is hard. I know. Sleep feels like a luxury, especially if you’ve got a baby, a night owl, or a child who randomly wakes you up at 3 a.m. to tell you they can’t find their sock. But when I do manage to sleep, I notice a huge difference in how foggy my brain is. So I try. And when I can’t, I forgive myself and drink a lot of coffee.

4. Lean into the funny.

There are two options: laugh or cry. And frankly, I don’t have time to redo my makeup. So I laugh. I make jokes about calling the dog by my kid’s name. I laugh when I find the TV remote in the fridge. Because if I don’t laugh, I might spiral—and nobody wants that.

5. Ask for help.

This one took me a while. I thought I had to do it all, remember it all, be it all. But asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s teamwork. If I forget the dentist appointment, I’m not ashamed to call and reschedule. If I can’t remember what I went to the store for, I call home and ask. Sometimes, I even ask my kid. They usually remember better than I do.

6. Lower the bar.

The bar for success used to be color-coded binders and a meal plan. Now? It’s keeping the kids alive and only microwaving my coffee twice before drinking it. If I make it to bedtime with everyone fed, hugged, and relatively clean, that’s a win. The rest? Optional.


It’s Not Just You

Mom Brain can feel isolating. It can feel like everyone else has it all together while you’re just trying to remember where you put your keys (hint: check the freezer). But let me tell you something important: this is normal. You are not failing. You are just a mom.

A mom whose brain is doing overtime while also juggling emotions, logistics, and probably a handful of Cheerios. A mom whose mental to-do list is so long it wraps around the block. A mom who cares deeply, tries hard, and still sometimes forgets what day it is.

And you know what? That’s okay.


One Last Thing

If you made it all the way to the end of this post without getting distracted by a tiny voice yelling “Mooooom!”—I salute you. If you did get distracted three times and came back to finish later? I see you. You’re my people.

Mom Brain is real. But so is your strength, your humor, and your resilience. You’re doing great. And if all else fails, check the microwave. Your coffee’s probably in there.

Friday, June 20, 2025

The Myth of the Perfect Mom – Why “Good Enough” Is More Than Enough

Let’s be honest: if you’ve ever sat on your couch, surrounded by laundry, wondering if Goldfish crackers count as lunch (they do), then this post is for you.

There’s a myth that creeps into our heads early in motherhood—sometimes even before the baby arrives. It whispers that we’re supposed to be perfect. Perfectly patient, perfectly organized, perfectly dressed, with perfectly behaved kids. And while we’re at it, we should be cooking organic meals, running a side hustle, attending every school event, and still somehow having time for self-care (ha!).

Spoiler alert: That mom doesn’t exist.
And even if she did, I’m not entirely sure I’d want to hang out with her.

Where the Myth Comes From

We’re not born believing we have to be perfect. It’s something we pick up along the way—from Instagram moms with spotless houses and matching outfits, from parenting books written in a tone that feels suspiciously judgy, from that one woman at daycare pickup who swears her toddler has never had a tantrum (sure, Jan).

It doesn’t help that society tends to reward moms who “do it all.” We applaud the mom who bakes from scratch, volunteers at school, and looks fabulous doing it. But the truth is, we’re all fighting our own battles. Some of us are just better at hiding the mess.

Perfection Is a Moving Target

Here’s the problem with trying to be perfect: even if you hit all your goals one day, the bar moves the next. You finally make a homemade dinner? Now you’re expected to make it healthy, Instagram-worthy, and kid-approved. Your kid made it to school on time three days in a row? Great—now people are asking why they don’t have extra-curriculars.

The more you try to be perfect, the less satisfied you’ll feel.

Because perfection isn’t the goal. Survival is. Connection is. Raising tiny humans into decent people is. And those things don’t require perfect. They require love, patience (sometimes), and an endless supply of wet wipes.

The Power of “Good Enough”

Let me say this loud for the moms in the back:
“Good enough” is not giving up. It’s letting go of unrealistic expectations.

It’s choosing your battles. Maybe you yelled this morning—but you also apologized and hugged it out. That’s good enough. Maybe dinner was frozen chicken nuggets—but everyone ate and no one cried. That’s good enough. Maybe you didn’t make it to story time, but your kid knows they’re safe and loved. That’s more than enough.

Kids don’t need perfect moms. They need present ones. They need real ones. Ones who teach them how to handle mistakes, how to be flexible, how to bounce back from a bad day.

What Happens When We Let Go of Perfect

When we stop chasing perfection, something amazing happens—we start actually enjoying motherhood.

You stop feeling like a failure for skipping the dishes and start celebrating the fort you built in the living room. You stop comparing your kid’s messy handwriting to someone else’s Instagram-ready craft project and start noticing the pride in their face when they show you their work. You breathe easier. You laugh more.

You realize that your version of motherhood—messy, loud, unpredictable—is beautiful in its own way.

Real Talk: My Own “Good Enough” Moments

Let me be completely real with you. I have:

  • Forgotten pajama day and sent my kid in jeans.
  • Fed them popcorn for dinner because I could not deal with one more dish.
  • Cried in the bathroom after losing my patience, then gone back out and tried again.
  • Pretended not to notice that they hadn't brushed their teeth, because I just didn’t have the energy to argue.

And guess what? My kids still love me. They still think I’m the best mom ever (most of the time). Because they’re not keeping score. They’re not looking for perfection. They’re looking for connection.

A Better Goal: Being a “Real” Mom

Instead of aiming for perfect, aim for real.

Real moms laugh. Real moms lose it sometimes. Real moms admit when they’re wrong. Real moms ask for help. Real moms love their kids fiercely, even when they’re hiding in the pantry with a cookie they don’t want to share.

And that realness? That’s what your kids will remember. That’s what will stick with them long after they’ve outgrown the laundry pile and the bedtime battles.

Final Thoughts

So to all the moms out there feeling like they’re not doing enough: you are. You are doing so much. And you’re doing it well—even when it doesn’t feel like it.

Let’s stop chasing perfect. Let’s embrace “good enough.” Let’s redefine what success looks like in motherhood.

Because the truth is, you’re already enough. You always were.

Friday, June 13, 2025

I Love My Kids But I Also Need a Break – Let’s Talk About Mom Guilt


Let’s start with the obvious: I adore my kids. I would move mountains for them, jump in front of buses, and survive on nothing but cold chicken nuggets and juice box backwash if I had to.

But I also sometimes want to run away to a cabin in the woods and just not hear anyone say “Mom?” for 24 straight hours.

This, dear reader, is the paradox of modern motherhood. The push and pull of loving your children with every fiber of your being… while also desperately needing a moment to just breathe, blink, and maybe pee without an audience.

And yet when that need for space bubbles up, it often comes hand-in-hand with a deeply rooted, sneaky little monster: mom guilt.

Let’s talk about it.


What Is Mom Guilt?

If you’re a mom, you’ve probably felt it. That creeping sense that you’re not doing enough, not being enough, or not enjoying motherhood enough.

It shows up when:

  • You let the kids watch too much screen time.
  • You’re counting down the minutes until bedtime.
  • You look forward to going to work because it’s quieter there.
  • You want to do something (anything) that doesn’t involve tiny humans.
  • You go on a mom’s night out and instead of relaxing, spend the evening worrying you’re a bad parent for needing it.

Mom guilt thrives on unrealistic expectations. Somewhere along the line, “being a good mom” got confused with “being an always-available, endlessly patient, constantly sacrificing, Pinterest-perfect superhero.”

Spoiler alert: That’s not sustainable. It’s not healthy. And it’s not fair to you or your kids.


Why We Feel Guilty for Needing a Break

The truth is, the guilt often comes from a place of love. We care so much, we want to be the best we can be. We measure ourselves against what we think good parenting is supposed to look like, and we panic when we fall short.

But it’s also cultural. For decades, moms have been expected to be the default parent, the emotional anchor, the household manager, the boo-boo kisser, and the tantrum whisperer.

Even when we have partners who help (or try to), the mental load tends to stay with us. And when we don’t have help? That load is heavier than a Costco-sized box of diapers during a growth spurt.

We’ve internalized the idea that needing rest somehow means we’re not grateful for our kids. That if we’re overwhelmed, we’re failing. But none of that is true.


Let’s Redefine What Makes a Good Mom

A good mom is not someone who never takes a break.

A good mom is someone who knows when she needs one—and takes it before she snaps, yells, or burns out completely.

Let’s say that again:
Taking care of yourself is part of taking care of your kids.

Would you tell your best friend she was a bad mom for needing alone time? Would you tell a fellow mom she’s selfish for wanting a hot cup of coffee without interruption? No?

Then why do we do it to ourselves?


Real Talk: What Breaks Can Look Like (And Why They Matter)

Breaks don’t always mean spa days and weekend getaways. Sometimes they’re 10 stolen minutes in the bathroom with a chocolate bar. Sometimes they’re a walk alone with headphones and zero tiny voices asking for snacks. Sometimes they’re choosing to scroll your phone instead of cleaning the kitchen right away.

And that’s okay.

Here are some small but powerful ways to give yourself a break:

  • Nap when they nap (yes, it’s cliché, but naps are magic).
  • Say no to extra responsibilities you can’t manage.
  • Outsource what you can—order pizza, use grocery pickup, or trade babysitting with a friend.
  • Set quiet time boundaries—even toddlers can be trained to have “rest time” with books or toys.
  • Don’t over-schedule—your kids don’t need 17 activities a week. Boredom builds creativity.
  • Ask for help—from your partner, your mom, your neighbor. You don’t have to do it all alone.

The Truth About Guilt: It Doesn’t Mean You’re Wrong

You might still feel guilty even after reading all this. That’s normal. The goal isn’t to never feel mom guilt—it’s to recognize it when it shows up and not let it control you.

When guilt creeps in, ask yourself:

  • Am I doing something harmful, or just something for me?
  • Will taking this break help me come back calmer, happier, and more present?
  • Would I judge another mom for this same decision?

Chances are, the answers will show you that guilt is lying to you.


Your Kids Don’t Need a Perfect Mom. They Need a Happy One.

When we show our children that it’s okay to rest, okay to ask for help, and okay to take time to ourselves, we’re teaching them balance. We’re showing them boundaries. We’re modeling self-respect.

And what better lesson is there than that?

So take the nap. Lock the door. Go to Target alone and buy snacks you won’t share. Dance it out in the kitchen with headphones on while your kids destroy the living room for the 47th time.

You are not a bad mom. You are a human being.

You’re doing your best—and that’s more than enough.


Let’s Make This a Safe Space

If you’ve ever felt guilty for needing a break, I see you. I am you. And you’re not alone.

Drop a comment below and tell me:

  • What helps you recharge?
  • What’s your biggest source of mom guilt?
  • What’s one thing you wish someone had told you about taking care of yourself as a parent?

Let’s talk about it. Laugh about it. Cry about it if we need to. And above all—let’s remind each other that we’re doing okay.

Even if we’re not ultimate.

Friday, June 6, 2025

10 Summer Activities That Don’t Involve Screens (or Cost Money)


Let’s be real — summer break sounds magical until it’s day three, your kids are “bored,” and you’ve already said no to tablets seventeen times before breakfast. And if you’re like me, you don’t have a ton of extra cash for daily outings or fancy camps. So here are 10 actually doable, mostly mess-free, and totally free summer activities to keep your kids happy and your sanity intact.

1. Backyard Obstacle Course

Use what you have — sticks, jump ropes, buckets, laundry baskets, whatever. Set up a course and let the kids race through it. Bonus points for silly challenges like crab-walking or hopping on one foot.

2. Nature Bingo

Make a simple bingo card with things like “a yellow flower,” “a butterfly,” “a rock shaped like a heart,” and head outside for a walk. It turns a regular stroll into an adventure.

3. Water Paint the Sidewalk

Give them cups of water and paintbrushes. Let them “paint” the driveway or sidewalk — mess-free and endlessly entertaining as it dries and disappears.

4. Library Challenge

Most libraries have summer reading programs with free activities, prizes, and events. Air conditioning and free books? Yes, please.

5. Lemonade Stand (With a Twist)

No pressure to sell anything — just set up a pretend lemonade stand. Kids can serve “customers” (aka stuffed animals or siblings) and practice their math and manners while playing.

6. Toy Wash Station

Buckets, sponges, soap, and waterproof toys = instant fun. Bonus: your plastic animals or trucks get clean.

7. Park Scavenger Hunt

Make a list of things to find at the park — a red slide, someone with sunglasses, a dog, etc. Turn a regular outing into a mini-mission.

8. DIY Backyard Camping

Pitch a tent or throw some blankets over lawn chairs. Let them “camp” for the afternoon with snacks and books. No bugs or late-night bathroom runs required.

9. Storytelling Circle

Everyone tells a part of a story, one sentence at a time. Go around the circle and build the tale together. You’ll be amazed (and maybe horrified) at where the plot goes.

10. Frozen Toy Rescue

Freeze small toys in plastic containers or muffin tins with water. Give kids tools like spoons and water sprayers to “rescue” them. It’s science, sensory play, and a cool-down all in one.


Summer fun doesn’t have to mean spending money or battling screen time. With just a little creativity (and maybe some snacks), you can help your kids make memories that don’t require a Wi-Fi password.

Friday, May 30, 2025

Dinner Didn’t Go as Planned (Again) — And That’s Okay


It was going to be perfect. I had the recipe pulled up, all the ingredients on hand, and just enough time to get everything prepped before the kids started melting down. I had a vision: a cozy, healthy family dinner, eaten together at the table like a Pinterest board come to life.

What actually happened?

One kid refused to eat because it “looked weird.” Another cried because their favorite cup was in the dishwasher. The dog stole a chicken thigh. I burned the rice. Someone spilled juice all over the floor. I ended up eating my dinner standing at the sink.

And yet… we survived. Everyone ate something, eventually. No one starved. And honestly, no one cared that it didn’t go according to plan—except me.


Real Talk: Dinner Doesn’t Have to Be a Performance

It’s easy to get swept up in the pressure to make every meal “special.” Social media makes it look like other families are sitting down to candlelit quinoa and lovingly roasted vegetables every night. But most of us are just trying to get something edible on the table before bedtime.

And that’s enough.


What Actually Matters

  • Did your kids eat something? Great.
  • Was it cereal, leftovers, or frozen nuggets? Still great.
  • Did someone laugh, even if there were also tears? Amazing.
  • Did you do your best with the energy you had? That’s the gold star.

Perfect dinners are rare. Nourishing your family doesn’t always mean homemade, balanced, or Instagram-worthy. Sometimes, it means buttered noodles and a Popsicle. Sometimes, it means ordering pizza and watching a movie because that’s what your sanity needed.


Let Go of the Guilt

Dinner doesn’t have to be magical. It just has to happen.
So the next time it all goes sideways—again—remember this: You are feeding your family with love, even if the love comes with a side of microwaved mac and cheese.

You’re doing great. Even if dinner didn’t go as planned.

Monday, May 26, 2025

I Yelled Today—And That’s Okay


I yelled today. Not because I’m a bad mom. Not because I don’t love my kids more than life itself. But because I’m human—and some days are hard.

The toddler refused pants, the baby ate dog food, the older one spilled juice down the stairs, and I had exactly 3.5 hours of sleep and no coffee. So yeah, I yelled. Then I felt awful. Guilty. Like I’d ruined everything.

But here’s the truth I keep trying to learn: perfect parenting doesn’t exist.

What does exist? Apologies. Hugs. Trying again. Kids seeing that grownups make mistakes and say sorry, and that love doesn’t disappear just because we lost our cool for a minute.

So I sat on the floor, pulled my kids into a pile of limbs and snot and snack crumbs, and said, “I’m sorry. I had a big feeling. Let’s start fresh.” And they did. Because kids are resilient and forgiving and made of second chances.

You’re not failing. You’re doing the messy, real work of showing up—even when you’re tired, overwhelmed, and not your best self. That’s enough. You’re enough.