Start by defining your relationship. This isn’t always easy, and sometimes it’s less than fun, but it is necessary if you want your relationship to survive winter break. Start by asking yourself if you even want your relationship to survive. College relationships don’t necessarily have to be preserved. If you’re not sure, ask yourself a few questions. Is your partner a person you would want to introduce to your parents? If you could, would you invite this person home with you for break? Do you find your current relationship fulfilling?
If the answer to any of these questions is ‘no’, reconsider your relationship. Not all romantic affairs are designed to last. If you really feel as if it will be too much work to maintain your relationship, then consider ending it before you leave for home.
Maybe your answer to these questions is ‘yes’. Maybe your partner really is your perfect match. And maybe you can’t wait to introduce this person to your family and friends back home. If this is the case, then you’ll have some decisions to make. These decisions will dictate what steps you will take to maintain your relationship during the long winter break.
Be prepared to miss each other. It’s inevitable, if your relationship is indeed worth preserving. Instead of spending the time moping about being apart, look at your winter break as a time to do those things you haven’t done lately. Spend time with your family. Hang out with your non-college friends. Go out on the town you haven’t visited in months. Pack your winter break with activities and things to do. It will make the separation a little easier.
Consider how far apart you will be from your partner during the break. It is possible that you could get together once or twice throughout the break? If not, you’ll need to pick up the phone, or use e-mail. You should communicate with your partner every couple days, if at all possible. Don’t have the time? Make the time. A relationship, especially a college relationship, cannot survive without contact.
Don’t start a new relationship when you get home. Your partner probably won’t appreciate you ‘taking a break’ from your relationship. If you’re lonely, spend some extra time with family and friends. Don’t go looking for someone new, or your relationship will surely fall apart before you return to campus.
Think about your relationship carefully, and decide if maybe it’s time to introduce your partner to your family. Winter break can be a good time to do this, and bringing your partner home with you eliminates some of the problems associated with going home for winter break, such as missing your partner or wondering if he or she will find someone else. Just don’t ‘surprise’ your parents. No one will appreciate it.
If you and partner decide not to be apart for winter break, carefully arrange your visits home. You might have to split your winter break, spending half with your partner’s family, if that’s what your partner wants. Winter break isn’t all about you, after all, not if you’re spending it with your partner. Consider what your partner wants, and maybe the needs of your respective families, to coordinate your winter break.
Winter break doesn’t have to mean the end of your relationship. Be open minded, communicate with your partner, and remember that you’ll be back at college soon enough. If your relationship can survive winter break, whether you’re apart or together, then you’ll face a brighter future when you return to campus.
